It’s only a model. No, no, no! Yes, yes. A bit. But she’s got a wart. He hasn’t got shit all over him. Well, Mercia’s a temperate zone! The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. That is why I am your king.
What… is your quest?
The Knights Who Say Ni demand a sacrifice! Look, my liege! No, no, no! Yes, yes. A bit. But she’s got a wart. And this isn’t my nose. This is a false one. I don’t want to talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food trough water! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! Now leave before I am forced to taunt you a second time!
- The Knights Who Say Ni demand a sacrifice!
- Shut up! Will you shut up?!
- Well, Mercia’s a temperate zone!
First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin
Shut up! Will you shut up?! Shh! Knights, I bid you welcome to your new home. Let us ride to Camelot! Shut up! Will you shut up?! Well, I didn’t vote for you. It’s only a model. I have to push the pram a lot.
Blue. No, yel…
Where’d you get the coconuts? And this isn’t my nose. This is a false one. What a strange person. Knights of Ni, we are but simple travelers who seek the enchanter who lives beyond these woods. You don’t vote for kings.
- Who’s that then?
- And this isn’t my nose. This is a false one.
- I don’t want to talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food trough water! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! Now leave before I am forced to taunt you a second time!
- Be quiet!
- We shall say ‘Ni’ again to you, if you do not appease us.
First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin
Well, I didn’t vote for you. Well, Mercia’s a temperate zone! Who’s that then? I’m not a witch. I don’t want to talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food trough water! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! Now leave before I am forced to taunt you a second time!
Help, help, I’m being repressed!
The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. That is why I am your king. Well, she turned me into a newt. A newt? No, no, no! Yes, yes. A bit. But she’s got a wart. On second thoughts, let’s not go there. It is a silly place.
Various versions have evolved over the years, sometimes by accident, sometimes on purpose (injected humour and the like)
Sections 1.10.32 and 1.10.33 from “de Finibus Bonorum et Malorum” by Cicero are also reproduced in their exact original form, accompanied by English versions from the 1914 translation by H. Rackham.
There are many variations of passages of Lorem Ipsum available, but the majority have suffered alteration in some form, by injected humour, or randomised words which don’t look even slightly believable.
grgerge
If you are going to use a passage of Lorem Ipsum, you need to be sure there isn’t anything embarrassing hidden in the middle of text.
All the Lorem Ipsum generators on the Internet tend to repeat predefined chunks as necessary, making this the first true generator on the Internet.
It uses a dictionary of over 200 Latin words, combined with a handful of model sentence structures, to generate Lorem Ipsum which looks reasonable.
The generated Lorem Ipsum is therefore always free from repetition, injected humour, or non-characteristic words etc.